Sisyphus Shrugged - a few photoshop tips
Lasciate ogni speranza and put your feet up.
jmhm
[info]jmhm
Add to Memories
Tell a Friend
a few photoshop tips
for whoever produced this thing

1) Line screen. Look it up. Really. If youre going to be creating things that were supposed to have been scanned from newsprint, you need to know about this.

2) Pixellation. Youve got about three different levels of pixellation going on here on areas of similar ink density. Not good.

3) Newsprint. You may be surprised to hear that there is no white ink involved in the printing of newspapers. Its not possible for a photograph printed on a greyish medium to have white burn spots.

4) Who on earth taught you to kern? Sloppy, dude.

5) Gaussian blur. When you put something on a new background, you really ought to blur the edges. Just saying.

6) Lighting. Did you not notice that the picture of Ms. Fonda was not taken in natural light, or do you not know how to fix that?

I dont expect that you would realize this, but feathered hair didnt actually come in unti the mid seventies. While she was protesting the war, Jane Fonda looked like this. Also, note the skinny little unaerobicized arms on the earlier Jane. She didnt actually bulk up until the mid seventies. You know, when feathered hair was in.

this is more of a style thing: the only way you can become a former vietnam vet is to die. Well, Our Fearless Leader may have found another way, but we've seen Kerry's paperwork.

sloppy. very sloppy.

edit: oh [info]carpeicthus of little faith.

here, from the same picture, shot in the same light, are Kerry's nose and Fonda's nose



Note the compression artifacts on the Kerry image.

edit again: I didnt say so, because Im a dizzy beast, but I totally snagged this story from [info]carpeicthus.
Comments
supergee From: [info]supergee Date: February 13th, 2004 04:47 am (UTC) (linkie thing)
There does not seem to have been much progress since the photographic decapitation of Lee Harvey Oswald.
From: [info]dublingal_ny Date: February 13th, 2004 06:05 am (UTC) (linkie thing)
Ooops! Sloppy indeed.
matociquala From: [info]matociquala Date: February 13th, 2004 07:36 am (UTC) (linkie thing)
Boy, do you offer classes?

How much do you charge?
jonquil From: [info]jonquil Date: February 13th, 2004 07:51 am (UTC) (linkie thing)
Marry me.

(Also, could you explain your terms for the visually illiterate?)
ryanbrenizer From: [info]ryanbrenizer Date: February 13th, 2004 08:40 am (UTC) (linkie thing)
Whee! I gave perhaps too much credit given that I was comparing to the Fark standard -- he did remember the black+white conversion, which is a strong step forward.
ryanbrenizer From: [info]ryanbrenizer Date: February 13th, 2004 10:04 am (UTC) (linkie thing)
Jesus! Apparently that fooled the New York Times. Guess those amateurs haven't had time to learn about newsprint.
From: (Anonymous) Date: February 14th, 2004 08:28 pm (UTC) (linkie thing)
I was slumming at FreeRepublic and came across who photshopped the Fonda/Kerry pic. I wrote it up here:

http://unfairwitness.blogspot.com/2004_02_08_unfairwitness_archive.html#107677512693858402

Yes, I'm being a hit-whore, but I also linked it up for anyone who's interested.
ryanbrenizer From: [info]ryanbrenizer Date: March 1st, 2004 07:27 am (UTC) (linkie thing)
Ha, I didn't notice the double attribution before, thanks. Given my level of stress lately, it's safe to say that my reactions to anything are totally random. Think i'll go shove some crayons up my nose and bark like a dog.
ahhhs. -- hmmm?
profile
Sisyphus Shrugged
User: [info]jmhm
Name: Sisyphus Shrugged
links
tags